Winning Over Worry

I always get tempted to worry about the things I can’t change, but at the end of the day, I discover that there has been a ready-made solutionn for those things, and my worry was worthless.

We all get tempted to worry about certain situations on our lives, and it seems Covid has made anxiety a more acceptable way of dealing with issues.

However, we all must realise that the major difference between worry and concern is this: a worried person tries to carry a mountain, and a concerned person tries to climb a mountain.

This reminds me of this old parable.

Death walked toward a certain city. The watchman of the city stopped Death and asked, “What are you going to do? “I am going to kill 20 thousand people,” said Death. The watchman went into the city immediately and warned as many people as he could. The next day, it was reported that 80 thousand people had died.

The man met Death again later that day and said, “You told me that you were going to kill 20 thousand people, but 80 thousand people died yesterday.” Death replied, “I only killed 20 thousand people, the other 60 thousand were killed by worry and panic”.

Anytime I have cause to worry, I remind myself that worry is not only a waste of time but the graveyard where peace and joy are buried. Why should I worry when I’m not a mortician?

Seven Features of Worry.

Worry is a profitless pressure.
Like a rocking chair, worry will give you an activity to do, without a real achievement to show for it. It offers motion without movement.

Worry is a pointless pursuit:
If you treat every stormy situation as a matter of life and death matter, you will live once and die a lot of times.
We are born again every day, we all have more than one life to live: the good life, the better life, the sweet life, the old life, the new life, the impactful life, the beautiful life. Add yours. Life is vast.

This is how I win

Worry is a pitiable prison.
Don’t turn a problem into a perpetual prison. Worry traps people in their old truth and stops them from rewriting their old story. Worry prevents people from enforcing necessary endings and enjoying new beginnings.

Worry is a painful paradise.
The looming tragedies that worry projects are imaginary. They are not certain. Your worst fear may never happen at all.

Worry is a pathetic pastime.
A pity party is not fun at all. No person will come knocking at your door asking to join your worry hang out. Worry puts you in a position where you feel comfortable with confusion and complications.

Worry is a pressure cooker.
Worry saps a great deal of a person’s emotional energy and can leave him completely drained and depressed.

Worry is a parasitic partner.
Worry never solves a thing, it makes you focus on the things that has gone wrong, and how they can get worse. Worry robs people of their peace, sleep, joy, hope, faith and love, and sometimes, it saps the life out of them.

How To Win Over Worry.

Tackle the trigger.
Identify the root cause of your worry and find resources or people that can help you deal with it. The antidote to your greatest worry is sometimes just a call, a counsellor, a click away.

Fix your focus.
Your priority matters. What you pay attention to will determine what you get. Life is operated on the ‘Pay As You Go’ system. If you pay attention to solution, you will get it.

Partner with Peace.
Peace is not the absence of trouble but the presence of God during troubles. We cannot control everything but we can create a system that sustains peace in the storm. Piece is always present but we need to position ourselves to enjoy it.

Pay attention to God’s promises.
We do not hold the world in our hands, but if we can hold the hands of the God who holds the world, we will be safe.
Life’s storm rages on its course, thriving through it all depends on our staying power and what we pay attention to.
“You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you.” Isaiah 26:3.

Pray and Play with passion.
Worry often makes people pray less. However, you don’t have to do long hours of prayers to snap out if worry.
Panic is a wrong response
to the things you can’t control.
Prayer is the right response
to things under God’s control.
Take time to have fun too. Like people say around here “Problems don’t finish”. Success is a product of problems.

Arise and Affirm
Study God’s words and find out the promises that take care of the problems you may be facing. Speak love, speak life, speak blessings and speak victory over yourself.
You can get a copy of Whispers of Winners here for daily doses of affirmations that keep worries at bay.

WHERE IS LOVE?

Hey friends, say hello to my first collaboration with my friend from S.A. Theodore Ndlovu

Love lives in the ocean.curing all bad moods,the waves wiping away worries,the waters seasoning every soul,Love is an endless expanse of wonderradiating with its vastness,a mysterious passion it is.It stretches across the horizon,and kisses eternal shorelines. Love lives in the sky.weaving a story through the subtle clouds.fabricating a newly discovered picture within seconds. Love lives […]

WHERE IS LOVE?

Making Happiness Common

If love is the only thing we have on earth, no soul will starve to death.

When I was 11 years old, I could remember a particular night that I and my siblings were sure of going to bed hungry. I was so starved and broken that I began to cry by the roadside, one of my mother’s friends saw me sobbing profusely and asked me what the problem was.

I narrated our ordeal to her. She went to meet my mom who felt so embarrassed to admit that she was a broke and broken single mother who couldn’t provide dinner for her children.

That night, I and my siblings went to bed well-fed, all thanks to my mom’s friend – she didn’t just give us dinner, there was something about her action that night that made me know that love is all we need to heal the world.

Covid has brought other kinds of pandemic in its wake (unemployment, hunger, mental health issues) and so we need another kind of vaccine. Around the world, more than enough food is produced to feed the global population – yet over 690 million people still go to bed hungry. What could have been the problem? I am sure it’s not about food distribution but greed and corruption.

Hunger is not just the discomfort associated with a lack of food but the distress associated with a lack of love. In our world, we have two tribes of malnourished folks, those suffering from undernutrition and those suffering from overnutrition.

Hunger seems to be the gulf between the greedy and the needy. Food security on the other hand is not just about the availability of food but the affordability and accessibility of food to the global population.

A healthy, hopeful and happy life begins when a person has adequate availability and constant access to nutritious and good food. Our world will be a better place when we don’t have to worry about where the next meal will come from.

We know that a peaceful world cannot long exist, one-third rich and two-thirds hungry -Jimmy Carter

It is often said that a hungry man is an angry man – no doubt, emotional stability is connected to nutritional stability. This reminds me of the Ubuntu story from Africa.

An Anthropologist proposed a fun game to some African children. He placed a basket of sweets near a tree and made the children stand 100 meters away. Then said that whoever reaches first would get all the sweets in the basket.

After he screamed ‘ready, steady, go!’
The children’s action mesmerised him. They all held each other’s hands, ran together towards the tree, shared the sweets equally among themselves, ate the sweets and smiled.

When the Anthropologist asked them why they did so, They answered. “Ubuntu.” Which simply means, “How can one be happy when the others are sad?”
Ubuntu in their language means “I am because we are”. This is a timely and timeless message for all nations and generations, all tongues and tribes and all people in all places – Let’s spread love, hope and joy everywhere.

I ask my friend, how can one be full when others are hungry? Collective prosperity is the only way to achieve world peace. Let’s make kindness common in every way we can. Touch a life today, make someone happy. Heal the world by injecting more love and light into the souls around you.

Let’s have a “Ubuntu” life.

We are apostles of affection
from a healing bloodline
We don’t give to receive
We give to reveal the nature
and the culture of our kingdom.
A kingdom of love and light
with blessings unending.
We are custodians of kindness
and wellsprings of sweetness.
Love is not what we feel or
what we do, love is who we are,
It’s locked in our blood and bones.
We are bred from a loving lineage,
genetically wired to be generous
and configured to be courteous.
We live to give and forgive,
we spread love and speak life
to everyone and everything around us.

Do you believe that we can end hunger in the world? What can be done? Please share your thoughts in the comment section. Thank you for reading.

7th Blog Anniversary

Having been so busy lately, I couldn’t publish a blog post to celebrate my seventh blog anniversary on the 1st of March.

Time has flown and I still can’t believe it’s been seven years of pouring out my heart to generate international influence. It’s all because of my loyal and loving family (followers) who are simply the sweetest. I thought of doing something spectacular and so I will be sharing 7 things you don’t know about me. I’m not a mystery guy, so let me share my history with you all.

Growing up.

I was born on the 29th of August 1986 into a polygamous family in Lagos, Nigeria. I believe that my name, Adeleke is God’s greatest gift to me through my parents. Adeleke is a royal name which means ‘The crown triumphs’. I was born into battle, and I needed a prophetic assurance that I am wired to always win. My parents separated shortly after I was born. I was raised by my mom who was a devoted Christian and disciplinarian. She raised me and my siblings to be contented and steadfast in our quest for success. 

I had to peddle goods with my siblings till I was 16. However, amid the hustle and bustle, I created time to read books and write articles.

Writing journey.

I started writing at age 10, but I wrote my first poem at 17 and it’s titled ‘Hope For Tomorrow’. In 2005, I started publishing my poems online despite my limited access to the internet at that time. My resilience paid off as I received my first international poetry award on poetrysoup.com in 2008. I have written over 10 songs and 8 has been produced by both locally and internationally.

I get all my support and encouragement from divine connections outside my family. I believe that my family find it hard to encourage me because they believe that I should focus my mental energy on a financially regarding venture. I was discouraged by their actions and apathy even after I won 30 USD for my fourth place win in the Poetrysoup international poetry contest in 2008.

Publishing my first book was a major miracle, God gave me vital connections that made me realise that family is more about bond and affection, and not blood-connection. God blessed me with a community that gave me all the necessary support to publish Whispers of Winners during the total lockdown in 2020. I draw strength to keep writing from God, the voices in my head and the great community I belong to both online and offline. 

I am also surrounded by an amazing Church family who celebrates and appreciates my budding writing skill. 

Relationship:

My experiences while growing up made me comfortable with solitude. Loneliness was my closest friend until I started drowning in the ocean of depression at 18. However, a vital part of me is extremely open and friendly. I don’t keep a lot of friends but I try to be loyal and loving to the few folks I’m able to bond with.

I had my first girlfriend in 2009 when I was in my final year at university. The relationship lasted for about three years. It ended due to infidelity. For me, honesty and loyalty are sacrosanct, if they are lacking in a relationship, I’ll jump out of the ship. I had a few random relationships until 2018. 

In December 2018, I proposed marriage to a lady but we had to go separate ways because I was very impatient and she was extremely dishonest and disloyal. Since then, I’ve decided to stay single and celibate, and also use my time and talent to serve God and humanity. It’s not been an easy journey but it’s been rewarding and blissful.

What I do for fun.

I love seeing movies and hanging out with my closest friends.

My biggest fear/greatest goal.

Poverty.  I tasted real poverty while growing up and I dread it like the plague it is. I have dreams that are bigger than my brain and my budget and I want to generate the king of wealth that will make me have a transgenerational impact

I want to get millions of people around the world out of poverty and hunger; two things I suffered while growing up. I want to bring hope and help to those in need. I desire to make the world a better and happier place. 

My greatest achievement so far

I would say bagging MSc in Measurement and Evaluation is my greatest achievement so far. Not only because I sponsored myself with my meagre income at that time but because I sacrificed a lot with the help of God to achieve the kind of grade I desired. at was during my master’s degree program that I developed Ulcer. It’s worth the sacrifice. (Smiles)

My greatest regret:

I’m not sure I have regrets anymore. I’ve learned to leave my past errors0 where they belong and live my best life, right here right now. I regret nothing and worry about nothing.

Thank you for reading my anniversary blog post. Do well to get a copy of my book, Whispers of Winners here

Kindly suggest a theme you would love me to write about.

Raise a Sound of Praise

The loudness and fierceness
of your storms do not signify
the silence or absence of God.
He is always near and speaking…
Storms always run out of water
But God never runs out of peace.
If He seems silent amid the storms,
Pay attention, He is speaking to you.
If He doesn’t calm the storms,
then, He is out to strengthen you.
Reach out to Him in prayer,
Rest on His promises, rethink,
Relax and raise a sound of praise!

No matter how fierce that storms of life may be, be still and know that God will never leave you helpless and hopeless. Raise your voice in prayers and raise a sound of praise. The storm will soon be over.

You Won’t Die Like This

Life is sweet but the truth is bitter. Life is a bed of roses, but it seems we have fast forgotten that roses have thorns and sometimes what’s beautiful can make us bleed. 

Good things happen to bad people and bad things happen for good people, but no matter how much you feel broken and battered by life.

When I became homeless last year, I got to a juncture where all hope was lost, and I told God to take my life if He doesn’t want me on earth anymore. But God, came through and now I can look back and thank God for those tough times.

Please don’t kill yourself, yes I am talking to you, my dear friend, don’t quit! I may not know your name or the flames you are going through, but whether it’s shame or blame – for the things you did or the ones you didn’t do, trust me, there is hope for you.

Your journey may be tougher and your road rougher than you can explain but you are stronger than your pains.

I know this may sound like a cliche but I’ve been there before – the valley of death where strong men feel lifeless, helpless & hopeless. The dungeon where fear and frustration feel closer than a friend. However, that prison is not a place of residence.

God formed you in His image for a time like this, you are not a slave to sorrow, sadness and satanic oppression. You are not created to drown in the dungeon of depression. Stop listening to the lying voices in your head.

You are not your past mistakes or present errors, you are more than conquerors. A champion made to turn challenges to channels of blessings.

Don’t let the deception and distractions of the devil steal your joy forever. God is willing to flood your heart once more with the river of joy.
I know it’s sometimes hard to let go and let God but find strength from within to go on your knees and beg God.

He is the help of the helpless and hope of the hopeless, He can fix your broken spirit and fill your soul with joy and bliss again. From those voices of shame and reproach, God can set you free. You have better and brighter days ahead of your, I pray you to begin to see.

I know there is no quick route to finding bliss but you can’t continue to live like this, and my friend, you are not going to die like this. Wipe away your tears and trade your tears for joy in the pool of prayers and positivity.

The devil wants you to perish in the prison of disgrace but God wants to plant you in the garden of grace.

Please don’t do it, don’t take your life, there is an end to this storm and strife. Death is not a termination but a transition, if you kill yourself I bet you will regret it because what awaits on the other side of suicide is worse than the pains and pressures of life.

Don’t believe the lie that it’s better to die.

If you think you are alone in the fight, you are wrong. Many people including me have gone through this valley and came out strong. Reach out to God and godly people around you, go on your knees and beg God to see you through.

I know it’s sometimes hard to pray because you don’t know what to say but God can hear your heart and the tales of your tears. Talk to Him every way you can, He can hear your silent scream.

God is mighty to save, It’s time to shift your focus and look unto Jesus if you don’t know him yet, it’s time to accept him. He died shamefully and rose again triumphantly so you won’t have to die in shame.

His love is strong enough to lift you out of hopelessness. His light is bright enough to lead you out of the darkness and His life. Cast your care upon Him for He cares for you.

If you desire to know more you can reach me via adelekeadeite@gmail.com

I strongly recommend that you speak victory over yourself and everything around you. Get a free copy of Whisper of Winners here, it’s a compilation of daily affirmations. Feel free to share with your friends

A Letter To My Crush

Dear crush, it seems we have been avoiding deep conversations since we started catching feelings for each other. There are a lot of things I wished I could say to you directly but I am afraid that you will cut off this beautiful bond between us.

So, I am breaking this silence with my keypad and notepad, attempting to tell you that I love you, and my love for you is pure and perfect – a slice of paradise.

However, there are things I may do or say that will hurt you temporarily, and there are things I may refuse to do or say that will make you doubt my love for you.

I am an imperfect man on a quest for perfection and full resurrection, yes resurrection.

My heart was broken, burned and buried by some of the ‘friends’ that occupied it in the past

I have lost touch with the reality of romance because the fragrance of my heart was polluted with the flame of falsehood, betrayal and deception.

I have loved the wrong people the right way and loved the right people the wrong way because my emotions were bereft of purity and godly purposes.

My love was blind because it lacked the Light of God. My love was dead because it lacked the life of Christ. I was looking for love in the wrong places – filling the God-shaped hole in my heart with the pleasures of this world.

All my previous displays of affection were born out of a distasteful desire – to fulfil the lust of the flesh. Although I tried to do what was right, but I was on the wrong side of morality and far from divinity.

At a point in time, depression began to set in, I drowned deeply in the ocean of frustration. While jumping from one random relationship to another, I found myself in the valley of the shadow of death, but the love of God was reckless, excess and limitess enough to find me.

God came running after me to rescue me. He lighted up every shadow, and whispered to me, “Dear son, death is swallowed up in victory”.
He transported me from the valley of the shadow of death to the mountain of the rainbow of life.

God added flavour and colour to my life, and now I can boldly say that I am salt and light to my world. I was rescued for such a time as this and ransomed for a treasure like you.

Dear crush, I am growing and healing fast, and I am trying not to go back to the pit God pulled me from and the sins He saved me from.

So, I may not say all the things you want me to say or do all you want me to do but I can guarantee you that if you allow God’s love to find expression in your heart and our friendship, we will do life together and love each other as Christ loved the church…

In the meantime, let’s flow in faith, fun and friendship. I hope this is not as complicated as you thought it would be.

– Adeleke Adeite

What’s your take-home from this piece? Share your views in the comment section. Thank you.

Sanity and Sanitizers

Amid global panic, pandemic and pandemonium, I have come to realize that we need more than hand sanitizers, we need sanity. Hand sanitizers can eliminate germs from our hands but what can eliminate fear and frustration from our hearts? Face mask has proven to be effective in preventing the spread of virus, but without ‘faith-mask’, a lot of folks may continue to struggle with depression, despair, fear, grief, and anxiety.

The scourge of Covid-19 has rendered world powers clueless and powerless. People all over the world still look up to the government, scientists and medical practitioners to proffer solution. However, there are certain things that requires more supernatural support and human effort.

Some of us wonder why God would allow the whole world to be groaning and grieving this much. Why would a good God permit bad things to happen? The question I ask myself is, why would a good man allow his wife to get pregnant, even though the woman will go through a season of discomfort and the terrible pain of child labour?

This pandemic has made some to lose their faith and love their fears. If you don’t have any iota of faith in a God that you cannot see, why do you fear a virus that you cannot see?

I have met quite a few people who say that prayer is pointless in situations such as this global pandemonium. Action is required, and I agree. I think that prayer has never been the solution to any problem.  However,  the lack of prayer has been the source of many problems.

Prayerlessness is not only a pathway to powerlessness, but it’s the catalyst of cluelessness.

Prayer doesn’t necessarily change the mind of God, but it puts us in a position to access the storehouse of God and also enjoy His peace even in the storm. God already has a plan and purpose for everything happening in our world. He is not trying to figure out how to help us.

He doesn’t need us to tell Him what to do, but He only wants to know if we would factor Him into our fears, failures, floods, flames, and frustrations. Our trust in God is a fragrance that invites Him into our situation. Faith promotes peace, progress, and prosperity. Fear, on the other hand, fuels frustration.

Faith Boosters and Fear Busters

Let me share with you ten faith boosters that have always helped me.

  • Don’t look forward to the light at the end of the tunnel, there is light within the tunnel, and it’s in you. Find your spark, speak your light into existence.
  • Don’t declare defeat when the battle is still on. No matter what you are going through, tell yourself that it is not over until God takes over. The presence of pain is not the absence of gain.
  • Don’t be an instrument of torment to yourself or the people around you. Encourage yourself. The fact that you are still breathing is a sign that God has bigger and better plans for you.
  • Don’t magnify your mess. Gold is not found in clean and comfortable places. We get buried sometimes because we are treasures. Life uses pains to refine and rebrand us.
  • Don’t contemplate suicide. Speak out. Help is always available. Rock bottom is not a burial ground but a good place to bounce back to grace.
  • Be positive in a positive way. Renew your heart with good and godly materials. Don’t just seek motivation, find revelation. What you know is more important than what you feel.
  • Be sensitive: life is always speaking. Storms have a voice. Don’t be distracted by delay, denial, or discouragement. Be vigilant to new visions if you desire positive change.
  • Be confident: bravery is an antidote to slavery. Cowardice has a way of making potential champions act like a chicken. Failure is not the opposite of failure but an opportunity to succeed. Face your fears and forge forward.
  • Be positioned for possibility. Life will not always give you what you deserve but what you demand. Don’t wait for things to happen. Make things happen. Take bold steps, even if they do not make sense at first.
  • Be prayerful: God has a pivotal role to play in our journey to survival, success, and significance. Those who deploy the drone of prayers see situations clearly and capture opportunities faster. Don’t be robbed of your peace and progress just because you refuse to include God in the equation.

I affirm that God will take you from panic to praise as you engage these faith boosters. I strongly recommend my book: Whispers of Winners, it’s a great tool that will boost your faith this season. Click here to get a copy. https://adelekeadeite.wordpress.com/whispers-of-winners/

© 2020 Adeleke Adeite

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