Heartily Single Happily Married

Posted on by Adeleke Adeite

I was having an online conversation with a beautiful young lady some days ago, she aired her views on marriage and relationships. Then she made a statement commonly expressed by some single ladies in this part of the world “marriage is not an achievement”. It was a good opportunity for me to give her some lectures on life and love.

When a person exerts a lot of physical, mental and emotional effort to make something work, it would be wrong for anyone to say what the person has done is not an achievement.

Don’t be misled, marriage is an achievement especially when two people work together to build a lovely, peaceful and beautiful family.
If an achievement is a thing done successfully with effort, skill, or strength, then a working/growing marriage is an achievement.

A great union is a medal of honour. In a world where families are failing, children are derailing and vices are prevailing, good relationships and godly homes are the antidotes to many of the troubles in our world. Family is the factory where world peace and prosperity are produced, packaged and dispensed.

However, singleness is also a great achievement. If you are single, sensible, self-reliant, serving God and humanity and not sleeping around, it’s not wrong to say that you are an achiever.

As a Christian, I believe strongly that singleness is not just status or season of life, it’s a symbol of emotional strength and social stability. Not everyone will get married – a bitter truth people fail to taste and digest. Singleness and marriage are major life choices.

Good or bad marriages don’t just happen, they are products or manners, mindsets and motives. Nothing works by itself. If anything is working, something or someone is making is work.

It takes a lot of dedication and discipline to be heartily single, it takes a lot of sacrifices and compromises to be happily married too. The prevalent high rate of divorce has proven that marriage does not guarantee happiness or fulfilment. Singleness does not confer loneliness or sadness on anyone. What makes marriage and singleness work lies in every individual.

Are you happily married or heartily single? I’d love to know your story. Share your thoughts in the comment section. Thank you for reading.

You are loved. ❤❤❤❤

Published by Adeleke Adeite

Adeleke is a poet, songwriter, author, tech enthusiast and life coach. He holds a bachelor's degree in Economics Education from the University of Ado Ekiti Ekiti State, Nigeria and a Master's degree in Measurement and Evaluation from the University of Lagos, Nigeria. He strongly believes that there is a garden of greatness in everyone that must be watered with words and fertilized with faith. He is passionate about building positive mindsets in everyone around him. He can be reached via adelekeadeite@gmail.com

25 thoughts on “Heartily Single Happily Married”

  1. I am happily married for 47 years. This didn’t just happen. It is something my husband an I work on every day. You spoke a lot of truth in this post.

    Liked by 3 people

      1. When you disagrr, never attack the other person. Alays stay focused on the issue. Put Christ first in your life. Everything else will fall in place. Never use the divorce word. Agree that it isn’t an option. Always remember you aren’t perfect.. It helps yu see there are two imperfect people in the relationship. You don’t have to be right all the time. Work as a team. Those are the things that keep a marriage strong.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. These are timeless recipes for a happy home. Thank you for sharing. I particularly like these “Put Christ first” “You don’t have to be right all the time” “Work as a team”

          You are a virtuous woman, Molly. Thank you for blessing my blog with your insightful comments always.

          Keep dispensing sweetness everywhere with your heart and art. god bless you.

          Adeleke

          Liked by 1 person

  4. Danke für die kostbaren Gedanken!
    Ich habe die Erfahrung gemacht, dass zwei Menschen von Gott zusammengeführt werden müssen, damit sie ein Leben lang zusammen bleiben. Das ist wie eine Berufung zur Ehe von höherer Stelle.
    Menschen kommen zusammen und trennen sich wieder. Das ist Begleitung für einen Lebensabschnitt, nicht für ein ganzes Leben. Deshalb würde ich nie mehr heiraten.
    Mir wurde bewusst, dass ich einen besonderen Zugang zu Gott bekam, als ich alleine blieb. Man kehrt nur dann den Blick nach innen, wenn man im Außen nichts mehr sucht.

    Alles Gute für Dich und Gottes Segen!
    Herzliche Grüße von Gisela

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Vielen Dank für Ihre Erfahrungen, meine Freundin Gisela.

      Deine Gedanken sind tief und wahr. Gott ist die ultimative Autorität in der Ehe und er weiß, was für uns alle am besten ist.
      Ich stimme Ihnen voll und ganz zu, dass einige von uns allein besser mit Gott verbunden sind. Ich bin froh, dass Sie Trost und Erfüllung in der Einsamkeit gefunden haben.

      Möge Gott Sie weiterhin stärken und unterstützen. Bleib gesegnet.

      Adeleke

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Both marriage and singleness are achievement if you’re happy. I’m agree with you. I got married when I was too young, fifty years ago. If I were today’s me that time, I would prefer singleness. Marriage needs too much patience and devotion. At the end you say enough is enough.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Spot on!

      50 years of marriage is a testimony of God grace and love, it also proves that you are a patient and kind woman, a carrier of sweetness and grace.

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts.
      Patience is a virtue we all should imbibe. Life is full of ups and downs and marriage only helps to amplify the need for patience.

      Thanks again mama

      Adeleke

      Liked by 1 person

  7. This is such a wise post, Adeleke. Very well-written and balanced. Lovely photo! ❤

    Whether single or married, each person is still responsible for their own happiness. Marriage is not a free ride. It is an obligation to be concerned with the happiness of your partner as well as your own.

    Have a great week! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Many thanks for your beautiful contribution, Cheryl.

      I agree with you, everyone needs to keep working on their happiness and emotional stability.
      Staying married or single requires a higher level of responsibility and maturity.

      Liked by 1 person

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